I Do….Iowa?

Well this whole gay marriage thing certainly is moving along faster than I thought it would; Massachusetts, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, Oregon all recognize some form of gay union or another, and I’m sure I’m forgetting one or two. But now Iowa, a state with an entire population only slightly larger than our own quaint Houston, has ruled that a law banning same-sex marriage was unconstitutional. Gather up your overalls and threshers, America’s Corn Belt has gone liberal!

Iowa? Really? I don’t see gay people flocking to Iowa for some reason. Is there some underground phenomenon I should know about? Would now be the time to establish a cute little coffee bar in the middle of nowhere? Is this really a victory in a state that has on average fewer than 10 people per square mile? I smell a conspiracy!

Iowa’s been sneakily reinventing itself and pushing its economy into new and sustainable businesses. Not being content with the titles of Food Capital of the World and the buckle on the Corn Belt of America, Iowa had to go and transform itself into a diversified economy of advanced manufacturing, biotechnology, and green energy production! C’mon Iowa, wasn’t it good enough being one of the safest states to live in, did you have to go and “gay up” your industry too?

It’s working, they’re growing in gays. Year over year, Iowa’s population and diversity has grown, not just from interstate immigration but international immigration. Who moves to Iowa!? Are the drug wars in Mexico that bad? The weather isn’t particularly attractive, with lows of 6 in January. SIX! Iowa, I’m on to you! You’re trying to lure the gays into your woefully under-populated state, create your cute, quaint towns, and redevelop your rundown manufacturing districts. Then, just when we’re comfortable and property values peak – BAM! – in come the yuppies, just like in Montrose!

You may have your progressive industries, Iowa, and you may have some of the largest green-energy production in this country, and the most literate and best-educated population as well, but…wait…progressive industry? High literacy rates? Highly educated population? Iowa hasn’t gone gay, Iowa’s come out of the closet!

All kidding aside, this is a fantastic move in the right direction towards equality. This is just one more feather in the cap of a state that has been at the forefront of civil rights through its history. Iowa rejected slavery in 1839, in 1868 Iowa schools were integrated, and in 1869 Iowa became the first state in the union to allow women to practice law. Who knew that we had more than just the East and West coasts fighting for our equality? For 170 years Iowa has been the quiet and powerful gentleman leading the way forward for the Midwest of our great nation.

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2 Comments

  1. I’m not all that surprised actually. I work with someone who told me they’re cities are quite liberal and very gay-friendly. Who knew???? I don’t see the gays moving out there, but it is definitely a step in the right direction!

    Interesting facts about Iowa’s history…I didn’t realize they were such a progressive state. Thanks for enlightening me!

  2. I’m not all that surprised actually. I work with someone who told me their cities are quite liberal and very gay-friendly. Who knew???? I don’t see the gays moving out there, but it is definitely a step in the right direction!

    Interesting facts about Iowa’s history…I didn’t realize they were such a progressive state. Thanks for enlightening me!


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